


everything we know is stardust

by donsdoie



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ancient Greek Religion & Lore Fusion, Angst, Blood and Injury, Happy Ending, Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun-centric, M/M, Parent Aphrodite (Ancient Greek Religion & Lore), Reincarnation, Soulmates, aphrodite is gay yall, yes you read that right someone dies but they all still live happily ever after
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:53:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26197423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donsdoie/pseuds/donsdoie
Summary: Aphrodite fell in love with his mother but it's him whom the gods decide to punish for it.Born of love, in spite of love, but not allowed to experience it.This was Yuno's truth.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung
Comments: 29
Kudos: 141
Collections: jaedo digest: vol. 2





	everything we know is stardust

**Author's Note:**

> prompt #062: jaedo au where jaehyun is aphrodite's son, he can't fall in love with a human or else his beauty will fade away.
> 
> please heed the tags!
> 
> title is taken from the movie 'before sunrise'.
> 
> _dear prompter,_
> 
> _you had only one don’t–  
>  i’m sorry i didn't listen._

💫

In the middle of anywhere and nowhere, where time wasn’t measured in days, years, hours, minutes and seconds, there once existed a man named Yuno.

Fair skin, pink and plump lips, soft hair that changed colors according to his mood, dimples adorning both his cheeks and a smile that put the sun to shame, Yuno was easily the most beautiful creature to ever walk the land. The fairest of them all.

Yuno hated it.

He hated how everyone took one look at him and immediately put him on a pedestal just because they assumed it would make him want them in return. He hated how everyone, from the wood nymphs to the minor gods, declared wars. Turning the earth inside out, as a means of determining who deserved Yuno’s grace, as if he were some shiny trophy whose sole existence was to be claimed by creatures he didn’t even care about. He hated that many have tried to get close to him, only to run away the moment he showed that he’s more than just his face, more than just the surface.

But no one wanted more.

They wanted Yuno to keep his mouth shut, to just sit there and look pretty. Yuno never really liked it when he was told what to do and they never liked it when Yuno did not do as told.

And that’s why no one has stayed.

No one has ever stayed and Yuno had come to accept this as his truth.

*

Although to be fair, his suitors weren’t entirely to be blamed for Yuno’s current state of mere existence. Because aside from being beautiful, Yuno was also known to be secretive. Guarded.

Getting to know him meant having to tear down every protective layer he had built around himself, accumulated from years of getting his hopes up only to be let down in the end. Nobody deemed him worthy of spending time and exerting enough effort to reach the last brick.

Especially not the mortals who Yuno had come to learn were impatient little things; if they did not get what they wanted in a snap, they moved on to the next thing that caught their eye. Which worked out just fine for Yuno because what is a couple of human years to his immortality?

Time was something he was not short of, after all.

“Why do you never immerse yourself with the humans?” the closest thing he could call his friend asked, not for the first time.

Yuno looked at his reflection in the mirror to answer, “Because they will be your downfall.”

*

When Yuno was younger, when he was a mere boy with cheeks often likened to peaches, his mom greeted him at breakfast with a kiss on the forehead. Once she’s done, they parted ways with her wishing him to have a good day, and a whispered warning to stay within the confines of their property at all times. Every single day without fail, Yuno was told this.

He never really bothered to ask why. Like how he never asked why all the kids in his storybooks had two parents while he only had one.

The answers came to him anyway, like most things did, one midsummer’s day.

That morning started like any other. His mom bade him goodbye after her daily reminder to stay within their land, not to mingle with outsiders, and then leaving to do whatever it was that she did in the city.

Yuno was pushing his food around his plate, not that hungry anymore, when he saw a mop of unruly black hair scurry across the hall. Never the curious kid, it surprised him when his body moved to follow the figure, like something was calling out to him, a puppet maneuvered by a higher being.

The Bae estate was massive; big enough that even after several seasons of living in it, Yuno still had not fully explored every nook and cranny.

He found himself at an unfamiliar wing, shabbier than most of his mother’s extravagant taste in furniture, the carpet still somehow feeling soft against his bare feet. Yuno soon realized that the reason why it felt unfamiliar was because it wasn’t as silent as the parts of the house he was used to frequenting. Rounding a corner, Yuno was sure what he’s hearing was music.

Except, this was not just any music. It felt more than that. Like an ice cold strawberry delight on a warm day. Like all of Yuno’s favorite stories in one binding.

Opening the door, Yuno came face to face with a boy. Almost immediately, the music came to a halt, silence befalling upon the two figures staring at each other; one in interest, the other in panic.

Figuring the other would not dare break the silence, Yuno opened his mouth. “Who are you?”

“I’m-”

“What are you doing here, young master?” It was Hyesun’s voice, his mother’s most trusted servant, someone who had been with their family for as long as he could remember.

Turning to look at the middle aged woman, Yuno pointed a stubby finger at the raven haired boy standing adjacent to him. “Who is he?” Yuno asked once more. Only this time, he was determined to get answers.

There was but a split-second hesitation in Hyesun’s eyes, her mouth set in a firm line. But she took one look at Yuno who was pleading with every fibre of his being and then she was bending her knees in front of him so that they were at eye level. “Young master, this is my son.”

She gently placed both hands on Yuno’s shoulders, bracing him. “Do you want to meet him?”

The boy was now perched on top of the windowsill overlooking the fields outside. Yuno took one glance at Hyesun who merely smiled at him, nodding a little like she was urging him to move. It was all Yuno needed to see before approaching him.

Pointing to the space beside him, Yuno asked, "Can I sit with you?"

Obviously it wasn't but he didn't want to disappoint his teachers by being rude to someone he just met.

Only a few things in life Yuno could say were as beautiful as him: the multi-colored artworks in the pages of his books, the food on the dining room table before he destroyed it by digging in and the music box in his room, the only thing he had left of his other parent.

But up close, face half in shadow due the lighting of the room, his almond-shaped eyes wide open and staring at him, Yuno thought that maybe it was time to add another one to the list.

"Okay," Yuno heard him answer, a blush painting his full cheeks.

Yes, definitely something to add to the list.

*

An unsaid rule; an understanding. His first secret. His first lie.

Yuno knew to keep the existence of the servant’s son from his mother.

Everyday she continued to remind him to be wary of strangers, to stay away from people she did not know or did not approve of and everyday after she left, Yuno made his way towards the music, an extra spring in his step.

*

They became fast friends, or at least that’s what Yuno considered them to be. He couldn’t be sure because he’s never had a friend before. But the boy was nice to him and his smile made Yuno’s heart warm all over. That made them friends, surely?

Summer was ending, the days growing shorter and the nights longer, and soon Yuno would have to go back to spending all of his time in the study room for his lectures. He didn’t want that. He just wanted to spend all of his time with his new friend.

“Why do you stop singing whenever I come for you?” Yuno was picking flowers, only choosing the prettiest ones. He wanted to have enough, wanted all of them to be pretty enough to give to the other boy.

Silence was all the answer Yuno received.

“Can you sing for me? I want to hear you properly.” Yuno’s focus was still on the garden. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see his friend shifting from one foot to the other. Sighing, Yuno was about to repeat himself when the hypnotizing sound he heard the other day came ringing through the air. He whipped his head around to gaze at the other in wonder.

Words failed him. Whatever it was that his friend was doing went beyond that. Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes.

That evening, Yuno created a new list in his head. It was of things he thought to be more beautiful than him. A list that only included one item.

*

Like most good things in Yuno’s life, however, it had to eventually come to an end.

They were in the field out back, stacking stones on top of each other. The sun was setting in the horizon, when Yuno heard a shriek coming from the direction of the house.

The knee-jerk reaction was to drop everything to look for the source of the sound. Maybe it was all in Yuno's head but he could have sworn that the moment he saw his mother make her way towards them, dark clouds rolled over the hills. Much like a preface. A warning.

"Yuno! What did I tell you about wandering out here by yourself?"

He was young and so, so confused. His mother never raised her voice at him. Never. "B-but Mother, I'm not alone. I brought someone with me."

With those words, his mother finally acknowledged the shaking boy beside Yuno. "And who are you?" she asked with an eyebrow raised.

"I'm H-Hyesun's son, madame. My name is Do-"

Yuno's mom did not let him finish because she was wrapping perfectly manicured nails around the boy's thin wrists and was soon dragging him away from a very confused Yuno.

Later that evening, after Yuno had calmed down to a sniffling mess, he asked his mother over dinner, "Why did you have to send him away?"

Utensils clanged against porcelain, greeting the night air with the occasional screeching sounds when the fork dragged onto the plate. Yuno’s mother did not answer him.

Patience had never been his strongest suit. “He was my friend-”

_“Yuno.”_

Somehow, the resounding finality in his mother’s voice was scarier than when she was screaming at him earlier. Dabbing a napkin on the corner of her mouth, Bae Joohyun looked him in the eye as she told him, “Did I not tell you to stay away from strangers?”

Yuno had never wanted answers to most things in his life, but this was something he needed to know. Something in him snapped. “He made me happy. What was so wrong with that, mother?”

The loud bang made Yuno jump in his seat. “He’s a mortal. He’s human, Yuno.”

Yuno was done with excuses. “So what? I am, too!”

“No, you are not,” his mother firmly tells him. Sighing in defeat, she looked at him; eyes full of love but also of pity. “It’s time I tell you about your other parent.”

*

He was sheltered, that much he knew. He also knew that there was so much of the universe that he did not know of, but no amount of reading and learning about the way the world worked could have prepared him for what his mother told him that evening.

Born of love, in spite of love, but not allowed to experience it.

It had been centuries and several lifetimes since Yuno had found out that he was the fruit of an illicit affair between Bae Joohyun and Aphrodite.

Yes, that Aphrodite.

It’s also been centuries since his mother told him that the reason why he was kept away from the outside was because the other gods did not approve of the affair (apparently, gods could choose to be homophobic if they wanted to), and that the day Yuno was born, they forced his own godly parent to cast a curse upon him. It was nothing big, not grand enough to warrant writing songs and poems about. Still cruel nonetheless.

Yuno might be the fairest of them all but he also was to lose that the moment he fell in love with a human.

A human who was the only thing to make Yuno feel anything, any semblance of love.

The fates think they are funny but Yuno is just tired of it all.

Numerous lifetimes passed since then and Yuno had stopped showing any signs of aging at the age of 24. Perpetually young and residing alone on a castle on top of the hill. Merely existing. It's not that he wasn't thrilled at the thought of being a demigod, of having something that not everyone had. Immortality came along with the job description after all. But after centuries of pretty much the same thing, there was nothing left to do but to exist.

*

Sometimes, just for the sake of it, Yuno liked to indulge himself with the fates. Like the literal fates. Since they had already decided to make Yuno miserable anyway, he might as well return the favor and drop in every once in a while.

It was the tailend of winter and he was just about done with the cold. Yuno wrapped his coat around his body tighter, pulling the collar up, hoping that this trip was worth it. Looking up, he ran his gaze up and down the harmless looking building in front of him. To the unknowing eyes, the building seemed to be about 10 floors. To those who can see through the mist however, the building goes up the sky, the top nowhere in sight. There was a little sign by the left side of the entrance, _Neozone_ it read, the neon green letters blinking in and out as if it were taunting Yuno.

Making his way inside, the warmth gushing out of the vents was welcomed and Yuno could finally stop complaining to himself for coming here. The front entrance was inconspicuous enough, gold-lined windows that matched the doorway, floral wallpaper and a moldy sofa on one corner. It was bare, save for the sleeping receptionist whom Yuno was familiar with, but not really on a speaking level.

Once he got on the elevator, he took a moment to recall which floor he was supposed to go to. He pressed the button for it after remembering what that one particular fate who had a flair for the dramatics told him once: _Visitors usually come here to ask about the universe and infinite lives, Yuno-ssi, only to leave disappointed when we tell them that there is no such thing, hence the floor number._ Whatever in Hades’ name that was supposed to mean, Yuno would never know. He also couldn’t be bothered to.

8 and a half: that was the floor number, the number 8.5 smiling mockingly down on him as the elevator chimed its arrival.

Even from a distance, Yuno could already hear them going at it.

“It’s my turn to talk! The last time he visited, you did all the talking!” whined one voice, airy in texture.

Two beats passed before a softer voice piped up, “That’s because when you do the talking, his visits are shorter. Tell him, Yangyang!”

Another two beats, another voice that sounded almost exasperated but already used to the bickering: “How about _I_ do the talking today?”

Yuno ran a hand through his lilac hair, sighing exaggeratedly once he reached the entryway to grab their attention. Inside the room, three figures were huddled together on a couch, passing among them what appeared to be a classic retro dynamic microphone that wasn’t really connected to anything. In fact, there was no wire attached to it at all. Upon hearing his arrival, all three heads whipped to Yuno’s direction.

The triad appeared differently to each visiting individual, depending on who they were. To Yuno, they were a group of gangly teenagers with an outdated sense of fashion: In the middle, there was Yangyang with his bright smiles and bangs that were suffering from bleached highlights. To the leftmost side sat Renjun, a defiant and challenging look on his face. And of course, holding the microphone was the bane of Yuno’s existence (and also his self-proclaimed baby)-

“We have been waiting for you, Yuno-ssi.”

“Hello, baby.” Yuno smirked at the brunette - Donghyuck - who he was sure was some kind of anomaly that the universe had created specifically for him. To make his life a little bit more miserable.

But by a long shot, at least to Yuno, misery was much better than the alternative. Anything was a better company than loneliness.

When Yuno first went to meet the fates, it was to give them a piece of his mind. Frustrated beyond belief and tired of feeling like he was a puppet to the gods’ disposal, he was a man on a mission with a long, winding speech memorized. It took him one look and a smile coming from Renjun, beckoning for him to come closer, and he was immediately backing down, grabbing a chair and playing a game of mahjong.

Mahjong. The foundation of this weird friendship that Yuno was able to build with the fates. Nothing like gambling with three all-knowing and all-seeing superior beings to pass his time by.

They were in the middle of another game when he saw Donghyuck grab the microphone and brought it closer to his mouth, “What brought you here on this fine day?”

Yuno looked at the tiles on his hand and discarded one. He was gonna win this time, so help him, gods. “I came to win this stupid game.”

From where he sat, he could see all three fates laugh at that; two in silence, and the one who held the microphone too loud. Yuno was competitive to the core, which was probably one of the reasons why he was always dropping by every couple of decades. This had been going on for decades now and Yuno was yet to win a game. He absolutely loathed the thought.

The microphone was grabbed by swift hands. “But Yuno-ssi,” Renjun’s voice reverbrated through the room, “If what we’re doing is so stupid, why do you keep coming back?”

Yangyang lunged for Renjun and two seconds later, it’s his voice that was teasing Yuno to no end. “Just admit that you actually enjoy our company. Then maybe we’ll let you win.”

Huffing childishly, Yuno rebutted, “I’m perfectly fine by myself. I’m rich, I’m beautiful and I don’t have to put up with anyone. Why would I ask for anything else?”

“Because you’re lonely.” Yes, Yuno’s least favorite fate was most definitely Donghyuck.

“Just because I’m alone doesn’t automatically mean I’m lonely.” He’s not going to go down that easily, at least not without a fight. “I enjoy my peace, thank you very much.”

Playful banter like this was familiar to him: Donghyuck poking fun at the fact that he was alone by choice and Yangyang adding fuel to the fire with his own quips here and there, the microphone a blur as one hand moved to grab it. Back and forth, they went. Then there was Renjun who Yuno never really learned how to read; and so like most things that he wasn’t familiar with, Yuno left him alone for the most part. But doing that proved to be difficult, especially when Renjun was being extra cryptic: “Well, enjoy what you can now. You won’t be alone for too long.”

Normally, he could have let something like that slide but upon seeing the reaction of both Yangyang and Donghyuck - mouths agape in disbelief like Renjun outed their deepest, darkest secret - it just was not sitting well with Yuno. He observed closely the trio in front of him, three of the universe’s most powerful beings, wide-eyed and so harmless looking. Caught off guard, Yuno almost felt impressed when Renjun suddenly laid down his 14 tiles one after another. Four melds and a pair: A winning hand.

Leaning back on the couch, the boy looked at him with a grin, grabbing the microphone from Yangyang along the way. “You must have a lot of questions.”

He opened his mouth to answer that yes, he did have a ton of questions, but Renjun interrupted him before he could, “Too bad we don’t have enough time. Good game, Yuno-ssi.” Beaming wider, the fate effectively wrapped up the conversation with a wriggle of his fingers.

Even though the purpose of his visit wasn’t to get answers, Yuno still left with more questions anyway.

While waiting for the elevator to come up, Yuno was still stewing over Renjun’s words when he heard from behind him, “Don’t think too much of it, Yuno-ssi.” It was Donghyuck, leaning against the wall with an indecipherable expression on his face.

“Well, now all I’m gonna do is think about it,” he tried to joke.

Donghyuck sighed, the hand holding onto the silver microphone going tighter. “You’re going to have to move soon.”

Yuno raised an eyebrow, “And what does that have to do with anything your friend said earlier?”

The boy didn’t answer, merely shrugging and pushing himself off the wall he was leaning on and Yuno could only watch as the fate walked down the long hallway. He thought that was it; the culmination of a long, confusing day. But Donghyuck was looking over his shoulder again, this time sporting a Cheshire grin as he called out from the other side, “Hey.”

“What is it now?” Yuno just wanted to crawl back to bed.

"Head east,” Donghyuck told him, winking, and then he was gone.

*

The sun and the moon blurred together in the month that followed, making Yuno feel like he's living a very, very long day. One that had no beginning and no end.

Another battle met its end in another part of the world, just as the fates predicted. This prompted him to move before anyone could get to him, making sure to vanish as if he was never even there in the first place, leaving no trace behind. And just as advised, Yuno headed east where he found solace in a quiet little town by the sea which was a surprise in and of itself because Yuno found that hiding in a congested city worked better for him. But he was here now and he was not about to pack up and leave again, not even if the town only had a population that was barely a thousand.

Almost already completely finished settling down in his new home, he was just wandering around his library and was growing a little bit bored. Not that that was anything new. The grandfather clock in the corner behind him boomed once, twice, thrice, before stopping on the fourth chime. Yuno ignored it. Time stopped having meaning if one walked the earth for as long as he had.

For some reason, he felt suffocated, more so than any other day. Funny, because he knew he was perfectly healthy, it being one of the perks of having ichor running through his veins. Sighing, he looked outside the big windows and decided that he could use a little bit of sunlight, his skin getting a tad bit too pasty to his liking.

*

Is it destiny when you allow the universe to pull its strings, to bring you to where you’re supposed to go or is it destiny if you choose to be there?

*

Out of all the seasons, Yuno was most fond of springtime. What is not to like when everything, from the flowers, the trees to the sky looked extra alive? He welcomed the vibrant colors as he made his way to the middle of the field where an ancient cottonwood tree stood proud and tall.

Sitting under the shade, he leaned against the broad trunk and closed his eyes for a bit, feeling the soft breeze caress his skin. He must have accidentally dozed off because when he opened his eyes again, he came face to face with… a mortal.

Immediately, his guard went up. Maybe he could close his eyes and pretend he didn't see him. Just as he's about to shut his eyes again, the man spoke up, "Just wanted to make sure you are not dead or something."

Yuno rolled his eyes internally. Mortals never have been the best best liars. "Obviously I am not so… Good day, now."

Apparently not taking the hint, the man who Yuno had the nagging feeling he knew from somewhere, a distant memory, merely shrugged before opening his mouth again and pointed a dainty finger to the spot beside him, "You look like you could use some company. Is this seat taken?"

Taking one exaggerated sweep around the wide, open space where they were, Yuno raised one eyebrow and deadpanned, "Yes."

Undeterred, the raven-haired mortal smiled at him like what just transpired was an inside joke between them. He paid no mind to Yuno's obvious indifference and sat down to his left, long legs spreading out in front of them. See, this is exactly why Yuno hated going out. Everywhere he went, there was always someone who wanted something from him.

They let the silence stew for a while and before they knew it, the sun had already begun its descent in the west and for the life of Yuno, he could not comprehend why he had not walked away yet. It never used to bother him when he cut people off mid sentence and left them without looking back yet they had not spoken a word for quite some time now and Yuno was somehow still there.

This close, he could see the features of the mortal a lot clearer and Yuno’s almost a hundred percent sure he knew him from somewhere. Yuno allowed his eyes to gloss over the other some more, observing a few things he wasn’t able to earlier. Like the fact that the man looked young; probably his age, or at least the age Yuno appeared to be, and that he looked pretty. Pretty enough that Yuno stopped being careful for a moment, not realizing that he was now blatantly staring.

"Just say it," the man said.

"What?"

There was a small smile on his face which Yuno found utterly annoying. How dare he smile prettily after coming up to him unannounced and disrupting his peace?

Turning to face him properly, the still nameless mortal said with a mischievous glint in his eyes, "You're thinking too loud, I can almost hear it. So whatever it is that you’re thinking, just say it."

How does one politely tell someone to bugger off? Yuno hated social interactions and had managed to survive with the barest minimum. It shouldn't be difficult to come up with an excuse to get out of this. Instead, after taking one close look at the smile of the mortal up close, he found himself saying, "Do you have a name?" Which was, quite literally, the opposite of the message he wanted to convey.

Was he really sure who he was talking to wasn't a witch in disguise?

Smiling even wider, if that was possible, the man got up and brushed off the soil from his worn-out pants. He offered a hand out to Yuno which he surprisingly took, helping him up. "I'll tell you another time. If we meet again, maybe." And Yuno didn't really have an answer to that.

He could only watch as the man walked further and further away, whistling a nameless tune, Yuno's eyes never leaving his figure until he was just a speck in the distance.

*

Weeks passed and in the monotony of his routine, Yuno almost forgot about the man with the pretty smile. Almost.

Wiping down the already immaculate furniture, Yuno found himself humming something unconsciously. It wasn't until the humming turned to him abandoning his chores, opening the piano and trying to find the right keys to play the tune in his head, did he realize what he was doing.

As soon as it registered, he stepped away from the instrument and took a deep breath. Grabbing his keys, he made his way out of the house for a second time too soon and meandered around aimlessly.

It's midday and the sun is high above the sky, definitely too hot to walk outside without an umbrella at least. Yuno felt a pinprick of sweat forming at the back of his neck after just a few minutes and so he ducked inside the nearest establishment that could provide him a reprieve from the heat which just so happened to be a bakery.

Freshly baked pastries, some still steaming, were laid out on a stone table in the middle of the store. A strong whiff of something that smells suspiciously like cinnamon wafted through his nostrils, making Yuno’s mouth water. He was just about to call out for a staff when he heard laughter coming from the back room.

The door opened a notch and Yuno could see a woman holding a tray full of bread, giggling at something the person she was talking to was saying. The pair made their way back to the storefront, allowing Yuno a better look at the other person the woman was with. Still engaged in conversation, they did not notice Yuno standing there until he cleared his throat in annoyance.

He was annoyed, rightfully so, because after weeks of trying to get him off his mind, the mortal from the fields now appeared in front of Yuno. Again.

“It’s you,” the man had the audacity to say. How could he stay so nonchalant and unbothered when Yuno was almost at his wits end? What exactly was the universe trying to achieve here?

Before he could say a word in, the woman he was with greeted him, “Welcome to Joy’s Pastries. Our special today is cinnamon and raisin bread. We also have locally brewed iced tea on the menu, if you’re looking for something to battle the heat with.”

The right thing to do was walk away. Crossing paths with the same mortal more than once - even in a town as small as this - was no coincidence. If there was anything Yuno learned through numerous centuries of dwelling with human beings, it’s that there is no such thing as chance. Everything was an intricately-woven web spun by the universe. It's a game - a gamble - that he wasn't willing to take.

It must have taken him a while to reply because the mortal was speaking up again, addressing the woman, a hand on her forearm. “Leave him to me. I know the guy.” As if Yuno wasn't there in the room with them.

The woman shrugged and moved towards the table, leaving the tray of bread she was holding onto beside the ones that were already laid out. When the door closed behind her after she went back inside the kitchen, Yuno wasted no time and faced the mortal once more, ready to end this once and for all.

But much like their previous encounter, the man beat him to the punchline before Yuno could so much as blink. “Are you following me?”

"Excuse me?" There were only a few things that surprised Yuno anymore. The person in front of him implying that Yuno had even the slightest interest in him topped that list. Scoffing, he couldn't help but raise his chin in an act of defiance. "I was merely out for a walk-"

"At noon? In this heat?"

"-and just so happened to have stumbled upon this bakery-"

"Of all the bakeries in this town, this street alone, it had to be this one?"

"Cinnamon rolls."

"What?"

"For the love of the gods, I just want freaking some cinnamon rolls."

One moment they were staring each other down and the next thing Yuno knew, the man was shoving a brown paper bag to his chest.

"What is this?"

The mortal raised an eyebrow, "Surely you know what a paper bag looks like?"

Oh, the things Yuno could do to that smart mouth.

"Yes, but what is it for?"

He was sort of expecting to be scoffed at but the man took him by surprise again because where there should be a sharp retort, there was laughter instead. And _oh._ Yuno would know that laugh anywhere–

"How many cinnamon rolls did you want?"

No, that couldn't be right. Mortals were rarely given the capability to reincarnate. That was only bestowed upon a select few who still had unfinished business with the fates, who died before they could get their closure. There was no way the man in front of Yuno was _him._ Was he finally going senile?

Mind still spinning, Yuno could only shrug in answer. "All of them."

As the man worked on piling his order, arranging them expertly inside paper bags, Yuno took the time to scrutinize him again. How did he miss it that first meeting out in the fields? The way his raven hair fell to his eyes. His high cheekbones and lips that were fuller at the bottom. His two front teeth slightly jutted out that made him resemble a bunny. The deep collar bones that peeked out of the front of his shirt.

The similarities were striking. 

At this point, as Yuno paid for the total, his body was just moving on autopilot. He needed to get away fast, needed to think properly and Yuno couldn't do that when the object of his confusion was clouding his thoughts with small talk.

Reaching for the doorknob, he could almost feel the heat of the sun on his skin when _his_ voice called out to Yuno,

"Dongyoung."

Somewhere, what was left of Yuno's heart lurched for a split-second. "What?"

"Dongyoung. That's my name. I told you last time that I'll give you my name if we meet again," Dongyoung shrugged.

Yuno froze mid step. He whipped his head around. _Head east_ , Yuno could hear the fates' voices chant in his head as he stared at Dongyoung in the eyes. The one time he listened and this is what he got.

Probably realizing he wasn't going to get a reply from him, Dongyoung waved him out. "I guess I'll see you around."

Yuno wanted to tell him no, they shouldn't, that it would be better if they never crossed paths ever again, but he probably had no say in this anyway so he opted not to say anything at all.

*

Yearning.

That's the feeling that was weighing down on his chest as he tossed and turned in bed that evening, sleep evading him.

Yuno yearned for something he once lost a long, long time ago. A fleeting feeling that he had all but forgotten.

*

Yuno hadn't left the house since his short walk turned trip to the bakery.

Not that this was anything unusual; he had always been a homebody and preferred staying indoors with his books and piano than to venture outside and interact with the rest of the world. Today was like that.

It was a little after his meal and he was lounging in the patio located at the back of his house, allowing the little bit of sunshine that filtered through the slats on the roof to bathe his face. His eyes were closed, ears perked up to listen to the chirping of the birds when he felt someone watching him. And then a voice broke the peace,

"I was beginning to think you were hiding from me, little brother."

Peeping through one eye to confirm the identity of his visitor, he groaned in defeat. "I was beginning to think you were finally going to leave me alone, Taeyong hyung."

"Well, family has to stick together and all that jazz, right?" Taeyong teased.

Opening both eyes, Yuno was still slumped on his seat in defeat. Peace just never was an option, was it? He regarded the silver-haired boy in front of him with a wary look before asking, "What do you want now? Just get to the point."

Taeyong grabbed a scone from Yuno's plate and took a big bite. Humming in satisfaction, he answered Yuno with his mouth still full. "Come on, little brother. I merely wanted to welcome you to my town, is all."

That caught Yuno's attention. "Your town?"

A smile that launched a thousand ships, enchanting mortals across multiple lands. Frankly, Yuno just wanted to punch it off of Taeyong's face but he had never really been the violent one. Taeyong was now drinking from Yuno's cup, swallowing down the rest of the scone with the liquid before speaking again, "Yes, my town. I've been staying here for a couple of decades now. Imagine my surprise when a big city boy like you decided to grace it with your presence."

Now Yuno could say with absolute certainty that the fates were screwing with him. Of all the towns he had to settle down in, it had to be the one where his only known half brother resided at.

"I didn't know you made residence here. If I had, I would have stayed far, far away. " Swinging an arm over his face, Yuno sighed deeply. It's not that he hated Taeyong, really, it's that their views about the universe and love differed vastly which often caused them to butt heads in neverending arguments.

"Alright, alright. I'll leave you alone. For now. I just really came to say hi, little brother. I thought I'd be a nice neighbor and welcome you, offer you help if you need anything." At that, Taeyong stood up and brushed off the crumbs from his shirt delicately, like everything he did, and walked back into the house. After only a moment's hesitation, Yuno soon followed begrudgingly. The least he could do is see his brother out and not let his mortal mother down (may she rest in peace) with his growing habit for bad manners.

As soon as they reached Yuno's front door, a question Yuno had at the back of his mind earlier made its way to the forefront of his brain again so he voiced out, "How did you know where I lived anyway?"

Taeyong turned around, one hand on the brass doorknob. Expecting to see another cheeky smile, Yuno was caught off guard when the other demigod looked somber and serious. Taeyong was _never_ somber and serious.

"Dongyoung told me."

It's just Yuno's luck that Taeyong also knew Dongyoung. Before he could respond, Taeyong was speaking once more. "Look, Dongyoung is my friend, Yuno. He's the first proper friend I made in centuries. Just… Just be careful with him, okay?"

Yuno wanted to tell him that Dongyoung was his friend too. In another life, another timeline, yes, but his friend nevertheless. The only real human connection he ever made. Although Yuno wasn't sure he had it in him to unpack all that and have that conversation with anyone let alone Taeyong, so he just nodded and bade the other farewell.

The silence as the door shut was deafening, amplifying the fact that Yuno was once again alone to his own devices. Pivoting on his heels, he made his way to the sitting room and sat in front of the piano. Not to play or make music. He just sat to think.

How could Taeyong do that? Tell Yuno to be careful with Dongyoung, a mere mortal, as if he himself wasn't suffering because of one?

The thing about Taeyong was, he had been in love with the same mortal since he knew what being in love meant and felt like. Or at least that was what he had told Yuno one night, drunk on wine and longing. Taeyong told him that when he met the man, he immediately knew he was the one, a concept which Yuno immediately scoffed at.

There was no such thing as soulmates when it came to souls like his and Taeyong's, something he reminded the other time and time again as he watched Taeyong love the man - who went by the name Johnny across all lifetimes - from a distance.

Yuno was a witness to it all: Taeyong meeting Johnny for the first time all over again. Befriending him. Falling in love with him. Watching Johnny fall in love with someone else.

Which was why he couldn't understand why Taeyong just did not move on. Like Yuno, he was beautiful and cunning, the perks of being Aphrodite's children. Taeyong could very much have anyone he wanted.

"Because he makes me feel less lonely," drunk Taeyong told him back then. "Because it's nice to know that the universe cares about me enough to reincarnate the same soul and have him meet me over and over again."

"Then why don't you ever make a move on him, Taeyong? Aren't you tired of pining?"

Taeyong burst into laughter, face buried in his palms, his whole body shaking in amusement. "That's the thing, little brother. You have your curse, I have mine."

"That really doesn't explain why you keep putting yourself through the same thing every single time."

Taeyong regarded him with an unreadable look before saying, ever so quietly, "One day, you're going to fall in love with a mortal. Then you will understand, Yuno." 

Yuno was sure Taeyong hadn't been coherent or sober enough to know what he was talking about that night, especially since the other demigod was one of the few who knew about his curse. But those words stayed with Yuno for years, like daisies in the summer, only popping up when they felt like it.

And that spring night, as Yuno still sat in front of the piano long after the sun had set to be replaced with the moon and stars in the sky, the daisies were in full bloom.

*

Summer rolled around and Yuno felt like everything had returned back to normal, or as normal as life could be for an immortal half-blood like him.

During that period, he had met with Taeyong several times and the subject of Dongyoung was never brought up again which somehow made Yuno feel at ease. Enough to slowly let his guard down and go out, leaving the safety and comfort of his mansion. He was on his way to his half-brother's clothee shop downtown, after the other coaxed him the night before to meet up for lunch the next day. Gods, was Taeyong putting his charmspeak to good use.

Seeing a small nondescript sign that read _TY's Tailoring,_ Yuno stopped in front of it and through the window, took a glimpse inside the shop. When he was sure it was empty, he went inside and plopped down on the only piece of furniture out front: a royal purple sofa.

Hearing a noise from the back, Yuno called out, "Hey, are you done yet? I'm starving."

The noise stopped and then footsteps could be heard making their way closer. A curtain was drawn back and there stood someone who was most definitely not Taeyong.

Yuno was hit with a pang of deja vu when he saw Dongyoung grinning ear to ear. Seeing the baffled and surprised expression on his face, Dongyoung blushed in embarrassment, the color a pretty shade of pink on his round cheeks, the grin slipping off as the seconds tick by. "I'm guessing you were not informed by Taeyong that he asked me to substitute for him today."

"No, he didn't." Yuno deadpanned. He was really going to kill Taeyong this time, for real.

Almost like he snapped out of something, the grin is back in full force as Dongyoung declared, "Too bad you're stuck with me today. Taeyong already left with my cousin, Johnny."

It was so like Taeyong to ditch him for a guy, soulmate or not.

He wasn't sure what came over him when he said yes and allowed himself to be dragged out of the shop, a hand wrapped around his wrist, down the street to the bakery. Inside, they found the lady Yuno met the last time he was there. She mostly talked to Dongyoung, asking how he'd been and all those niceties. Yuno wasn't sure what he was supposed to do so he opted to just watch the interaction and stew in silence. This Dongyoung was chatty, that was the glaring difference he noticed from the Dongyoung he met when he was young to the Dongyoung in front of him now. He commanded the room and the attention of everyone in it, including Yuno's.

The staring must have gotten too much because the man looked at the corner where Yuno was standing and put up a hand, signaling for him to wait. After getting enough for two people, he saw Dongyoung go in the kitchen, coming back with a basket where he placed the selection he made.

They left the store with a wave to the owner, Joy, and then they were on their merry way again.

Not really paying attention to where he was going, he jolted in shock when a loud horn broke through the summer air and he was pulled out of the way by a strong grip.

The source of the scandalous sound was a vehicle whose driver merely flipped them off before zooming down the road again.

"Watch where you're going. You could have gotten hurt." Dongyoung scolded him and out of everything that had happened, that was somehow Yuno's breaking point after this long, eventful morning.

"What's it to you? I never asked you to be here, to get lunch with me. Why do you care so much? I didn't tell you to keep me company." Yuno knew he was being childish but he couldn't stop the words from spilling out of his mouth even if he tried.

Dongyoung's eyes softened and he looked at him, not unkindly. "I'm here because I want to be. No one is forcing you to spend time with me. You can just leave if I make you that uncomfortable." Looking at both sides of the road before crossing, Dongyoung left him in the middle of the sidewalk.

That was a challenge if Yuno ever heard one. And really, there was no one else to blame because even after he was given an out, Yuno still ran after Dongyoung and followed him like a lost puppy.

He found Dongyoung sitting under one of the trees outlining the fields. The man had already laid out a blanket and was sitting on it, legs stretched out in front of him.

Thinking twice about every decision he had ever made that got him to this crossroad, Yuno was just about to call it a day when he heard Dongyoung shout, "Well, are you just going to stand there all day like a creep?" The teasing tone was back and a weight was lifted off Yuno's shoulders.

Yuno sat down beside Dongyoung, backs leaning against the trunk of the tree and he was once again hit with deja vu. Chuckling to himself, Yuno felt Dongyoung nudge him by the elbow. "Are you going to share what's making you laugh like a madman?"

For the first time in days, Yuno smiled. He was giving himself whiplash. "It's just that we always seem to find ourselves in similar situations everytime we meet."

"Like we're soulmates?"

The laughter died in Yuno's throat. "No. I do not believe in that."

Bumping his shoulder against Yuno's, Dongyoung hummed, "I was just kidding, by the way. I do have to say I'm a little bit surprised. Didn't peg you as an unbeliever."

Yuno tried to humor him. "If the universe gave me enough reason to believe, then I would."

"Then the universe just has to work harder. I'll make sure to relay your message to them, Yuno-ssi." Dongyoung punctuated his words with a cheeky wink to Yuno.

It was silent afterwards. Dongyoung handed him a few slices of bread and a glass of iced tea which he graciously accepted. This wasn't so bad, he decided. Spending time with Dongyoung was almost as easy as how it had been back then. Yuno just had to learn to keep him at arm's length. It was better that way for the both of them. But now, he thought he's at least allowed to enjoy this.

They made small talk for a while, and it was only after Dongyoung said his name three times that Yuno realized something. "How do you know my name? I never gave it to you."

Dongyoung shrugged, "Taeyong kept a painting of one of his mothers and brother in his shop. He mentioned his brother's name at one point so it has kind of been something I've always known. Truthfully, I already knew who you were that first meeting here in the fields. I took one look at you, recalled the painting and just put two and two together. It's hard to forget a face as beautiful as yours, after all."

Mind you, Yuno had been called beautiful by others, even minor gods and all kinds of creatures across all walks of life, but he had never felt flustered or blushed like an inexperienced teenager before.

Until now.

To distract himself, Yuno grabbed the first thing he could from Dongyoung's basket and bit on it without thought, the taste of cinnamon tickling his tongue soon enough.

Dongyoung lit up when he noticed what Yuno was chewing on. "Oh, good, you got the cinnamon roll. I got it especially for you, seeing as how you liked it last time. You wiped out the whole bakery and Joy cried in relief because she could finally close early for once."

It's nice. Having someone notice the little things about him even without him explicitly saying them out loud.

Yuno thought that this was something he could get used to.

*

A routine soon developed and Yuno wasn't about to complain.

The mornings were devoted to himself, whatever he felt like doing that day. Art, music, literature, to workout or to cook. Anything and everything he could do inside his house. By the time noon came, he was out the door and walking the short distance to the tailor shop where Dongyoung would be waiting for him. Sometimes, Taeyong joined them, Johnny too occasionally, but for the most part, it was just him and Dongyoung.

So much for keeping the mortal at a distance, he found himself thinking one day as he watched Dongyoung run after the butterflies like a little kid after a hearty meal of baked potatoes and spring chicken.

Yuno counter-argued with that nagging voice in his head that just because he wasn't allowed to fall in love with a mortal didn't mean he wasn't allowed to befriend one.

After lunch, he usually trekked back home and occupied himself with work. He really didn't have to, money wasn't something he was lacking, but work kept him busy and sane. It stopped his mind from wandering too much to gummy smiles and melodic laughter.

In the evenings, music filled the whole house.

Yuno once mentioned in passing that he was having a difficult time maintaining the cleanliness of his house by himself and how he was willing to pay a fortune for someone to come over and help out. That same night Dongyoung was entering his place with a bucket and an old mop in both hands. Yuno was against it at first but Dongyoung was insistent, saying that he was good at cleaning and the extra money wasn't unwelcomed either.

"I have little mouths to feed," Dongyoung declared and Yuno could feel his heart sinking to his stomach. He didn't know Dongyoung was a father. Yuno told him as such.

"What kids?" Dongyoung clarified with furrowed brows. Then a lightbulb moment, "Oh, you mean my dogs?"

The tightness in Yuno's chest loosened completely. "Yes, I meant your dogs. Would you tell me about them?"

Given an opening, the man then went on a tirade about the struggles of living as a single dad to five dogs. Dongyoung's voice, even complaining about heats and fur all over his duvet, was music to Yuno's ears. It traveled throughout the whole mansion that even long after Dongyoung had gone for the day, Yuno could still hear him.

The only problem with developing a routine was that you get used to it after a while.

And getting used to it meant that when change inevitably arrived, it wasn't as easy to accommodate and succumb to.

*

The more Yuno came to know about Dongyoung, the more he found it hard to stay away.

"What do you think happens after death, Yuno-ssi?"

The question caught Yuno unawares. They were merely talking about the inflation of rates a while ago. "I don't know?"

 _Liar,_ the snide voice in his head told him _, you know very well what happens to the souls of the deceased._

Yuno used to be close acquaintances with Death but ever since the gods drew a line between the world of everything supernatural and the mortal realm, he had sort of lost contact with her. He kind of missed Naeun's company but that's a thought for another day.

"Hmmm. Then what about reincarnation? Do you think it's possible for a soul to live more than one lifetime?"

A little bit of truth never hurt anyone. Yuno mulled over his next words carefully. "I read somewhere that a soul is only reincarnated when it has unfinished business in this world or when it still hasn't achieved or met its purpose."

He could feel Dongyoung's stare boring holes into his face before turning back to look at the view in front of them, bending his knees so he could hug his legs to his chest. Dongyoung comments after a while, "That makes sense. Do you agree with that theory, Yuno-ssi?"

The conversation was heading towards dangerous territory, one that Yuno wasn't sure he could handle especially with someone as smart as Dongyoung. He decided to deflect and ask a question himself, "What do _you_ think?"

Dongyoung didn't respond right away, probably caught up in his own thoughts. Yuno turned to the side and looked at the man's side profile. Even with just half his face seen, Dongyoung could easily pass off as a demigod. Or maybe it's just Yuno's biased views talking.

"I think… I think this wasn't my first life."

Yuno held his breath.

Facing him as well, Dongyoung sighed deeply before continuing. "You might think I'm crazy for what I'm about to tell you but… Sometimes, I feel like I remember things I shouldn't, or at least things I couldn't have possibly known about and have no prior experience with before. Like the piano, for example. I had zero knowledge on how to play it and then one day, I just woke up and I could play pieces I've never even heard before. I told you it sounds crazy."

Yuno wanted to assure him that he didn't but he couldn't do that without the risk of telling Dongyoung who he actually was and the history they shared.

"And then you. Yuno-ssi, the day I saw you taking a nap under the cottonwood tree in the middle of the field? I approached you because I felt like I knew you from somewhere, and it wasn't just from the painting Taeyong had mounted on his wall. You know, I don't usually bother strangers who are simply minding their own business," Dongyoung chuckled halfheartedly, "But with you, I just had to. I felt like I was going to go mad if I had not. If the theory you read about souls reincarnating is correct, that must mean something happened in my past life that I wasn't able to get closure from, right?"

Yuno wanted to reach out and hold Dongyoung in his arms. He didn't. He couldn't. Not like this.

"I know I'm not making sense but… I don't know. I'm sorry. Don't mind me."

And while he himself had so many questions, Yuno couldn't help but wonder, what if Dongyoung's reincarnation really had something to do with him?

Kneeling up, Dongyoung started packing their things inside the basket, stopping only when he saw the hand Yuno placed on his thigh. "It makes sense to me, Dongyoung."

Two souls intertwined, all the chips on the table, the outcome depending entirely on how they played their cards. If they played it right.

The smile Dongyoung rewarded him with was well worth it. "That's the first time you called me by name, Yuno-ssi. You should do it more often."

*

Yuno woke up one day with his hair turned the lightest shade of pink overnight.

He had only ever seen this color on Taeyong before, around the times Taeyong reunited with an adult Johnny after every reincarnation.

"How do you change the color of your hair so often?" Dongyoung queried, ever the curious one.

Although Yuno had no way of explaining it himself. So he opted to take the safer route. "The same way Taeyong does it."

Dongyoung hummed but did not pursue it further, going instead on a tangent about how the summer season was too hot that year, how everyone was probably destroying mother earth upon every advancement in technology. Yuno wanted to tell him that Gaea had been asleep for eons now and would most likely not care anyway, but Dongyoung was just going on and on with no signs of stopping.

Smiling at every exaggerated gesture Dongyoung punctuated his words with, Yuno would not have it any other way. He could just listen to Dongyoung talk all day.

Alone at home, with no Dongyoung to distract him from his thoughts, it was a different story.

_One day, you're going to fall in love with a mortal. Then you will understand, Yuno._

Yuno did not have the energy nor the right to scoff at those words anymore because he was starting to understand what Taeyong was talking about, what he had meant, when he told Yuno that all those years ago.

But knowing and accepting were two vastly different things.

*

Self-preservation; the thing Yuno was best at. That was how he survived all these years without falling in love and falling into the fates' hands. Self-preservation was also how he was able to last not leaving the house to spend time with Dongyoung the past couple of days.

It was nearing the end of autumn, and winter was just around the corner. Rain came pouring down day and night, which was what Yuno used to excuse his cowardice. He was still in his pajamas, snacking on a carrot stick when loud knocks on his front door synchronized with the thunder and lightning outside.

"Who is it?" he called out.

No verbal response, just the incessant knocking that showed no signs of stopping unless Yuno opened up for them. He kind of already knew who was on the other side. Sure enough, a thoroughly wet Dongyoung greeted him. "Why have you stopped coming by the shop?" He demanded without preamble.

Yuno was speechless, but that was because he didn't know how to answer Dongyoung's question without outing himself. " _I'm a cursed demigod and if I fall in love with a mortal, I'm going to lose the beautiful face you seem to like so much. And I think I'm not far off. I'm trying to stay away from you but it hasn't been exactly easy for me too"_ was what he should have told him.

Instead, Yuno found himself saying, "It got boring now."

The way Dongyoung's expression crumpled, Yuno could have very well slammed the door on his face. But if there was anything Yuno learned about the Dongyoung from this timeline, it's that he was stubborn to a fault. In a split-second, the beaten down expression was wiped off. In its place was something Yuno had never seen before. Determination.

"You've grown bored, you say? You should have told me. Then, I could have done this much sooner."

"Wha-"

Dongyoung's lips were soft and tasted of apples and vanilla. They were incredibly addictive. Yuno barely realized what was going on when Dongyoung pulled back, gauging his reaction.

The thing about addiction is, Yuno never really learned how to say no once he got a taste of it. Self-preservation be damned.

Pulling Dongyoung back in with a rough hand on his nape, Yuno wasted no time and swooped in, hoping to find the sweet taste of apples and vanilla once more.

Another rumble of thunder could be heard in the distance. Along with it was the sound of the door slamming behind them as they made their way to Yuno's room in feverish haste, not once disconnecting from each other.

*

The sky was pitch black, the stars and the moon hid behind the dark clouds that were threatening to spill angry drops of rain again any time soon.

In bed, side by side, they lay still. Afraid to move. Afraid to face the consequences of their actions. Afraid to know what the other was thinking.

But Dongyoung had always been the braver of them two. "Is… Is this a mistake to you, Yuno?"

 _No,_ Yuno's mind supplied. _Never._

"Yes," Yuno answered. Regret immediately filling his stomach.

The bout of bitter, mocking laughter that came out of Dongyoung's mouth was enough to shake Yuno awake.

"Liar."

"Excuse me?" Yuno was more confused than affronted. He looked over and Dongyoung was already sitting up in bed, the blanket falling off his naked torso.

Dongyoung's voice was filled with venom. "You have always been a bad liar, Yuno. I may not remember everything but I remember you and I remember that you can't lie to save your life."

And now Yuno was thoroughly at a loss. Yes, they knew each other in this timeline but not enough for Dongyoung to be speaking to him this way. "What do you mean?"

Dongyoung's next words caused the ground to fall beneath Yuno's feet,

"I said I know everything. You and Taeyong being children of Aphrodite, and about us meeting in one of my past lives. I know, Yuno."

Yuno should have known. Of course Dongyoung knew. He was smart and he had been friends with Taeyong for decades.

The feeling of betrayal seeped in, an ugly and bitter monster. "Then why did you pretend you didn't, all this time?" 

He felt more than saw Dongyoung pick up his discarded pieces of clothing scattered around the room, in a hurry to put some space between them. "Because I wanted to see if you were going to do something about it, Yuno."

"Something about what?" Yuno was also standing up at this point, grabbing the robe that he had draped over the chair by his bedside.

"About us."

When Yuno told him, "There's nothing between us, Dongyoung. We just knew each other in your past life, that's it. Don't delude yourself," he really didn't mean it. He was mad at being lied to. It was the betrayal speaking more than anything.

"And what about now? Do we just," Dongyoung made air quotes, "Know each other now, too? Is that all this is to you?"

Yuno reeled in, exhaling through the mouth. "Yes."

Dongyoung paused, one foot inside his slacks. "When are you going to stop being a coward?"

"How dare you? You don't know anything about me."

The worn out smile Dongyoung gave him was surely going to haunt Yuno for the rest of his existence. "How would I if you don't tell me anything?"

There it was. Yuno's walls, the layers of protection he had built around himself had finally come back to bite him in the ass. Whatever was left of the surge of adrenaline caused by the argument drained in a blink of an eye. Yuno was just tired. So, so tired.

"Look, I don't want to argue with you anymore. You may stay here for the night if you want. I'll be sleeping in the other room."

He had one hand on the doorknob when Dongyoung spoke up again, voice weaker and a lot more unsure than a few seconds ago,

"Do you want me here?"

Yuno didn't know what he wanted anymore. Holding onto the doorframe tightly, his knuckles were almost white in strain, hands shaking. Whether in anger or denial, Yuno wasn't sure anymore. "What does it matter what I want?"

"So you don't?"

"Just do whatever, Dongyoung. I'm tired."

"I see." It was silent after that, save for the rustling of clothes and the muffled pitter-patter of the rain against his roof. The rain probably started again in the middle of their confrontation. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Dongyoung move closer to his spot in the doorway.

"I don't know what you're really afraid of, Yuno-ssi, or why you are so afraid of this." The formality stung Yuno more than any of the previous words they exchanged. Dongyoung was fully clothed at this point. Brushing past him, back facing Yuno, Dongyoung delivered the final blow. "I just hope you haven't forgotten that Aphrodite isn't just the goddess of beauty. When that finally gets through your thick skull, you know where to find me."

And with that, Dongyoung exited the room, leaving Yuno alone with his thoughts again.

Just like how it had always been.

*

Yuno never minded being alone before. In fact, he enjoyed it.

But as he made his way down the hallway towards his front door, the silence echoed louder than it had ever been.

He wasn't entirely sure why he came out of his room in the first place. To check if the other was really gone? To trample down the hope that maybe Dongyoung had stayed despite Yuno telling him to get out of his house?

To confirm that he had, in fact, managed to screw up the one good thing he had going for him all because he was a selfish coward?

It was still storming outside when Yuno fell into restless sleep on the couch where he had a clear view of his front door.

*

Another thing about Taeyong was, he liked to make everyone's business his business.

The curtains were drawn back, permitting the sunlight to hit Yuno in the face, effectively waking him up earlier than he would have wanted to be.

Taeyong only told him two words. "Get up."

“I don’t see how this is any of your business,” Yuno said in between sips of his tea.

They were out on the patio even though some of the furniture were still wet from the storm that took over the whole region yesterday. Even though the rain had let up sometime in the early morning and it was sunny now, the air still smelled of musk and dew.

“Yuno, you may be my brother by blood and magic but Dongyoung is my friend by choice.”

No surprise there. Yuno would have chosen Dongyoung over himself too. But he was still stubborn as ever, something like that didn't go away overnight. The words he said out loud were the exact opposite of what he really meant. “If that's your way saying you prefer him over me, then I have to tell you, I really don’t care.

“Is that why you sent him away in the middle of a storm? Because you don’t care?” Taeyong crossed his legs and sat back in his chair. This was starting to feel oddly like an interrogation.

Adding more sugar to his tea, Yuno took his time to answer. “I told him he could stay if he wanted to. He left so I’m assuming he didn’t.”

The other demigod's demeanor still appeared calm so Yuno would not have known Taeyong was getting riled up already if not for the underlying warning in his tone. “He asked you if you wanted him to stay. You said no.”

Yuno sighed. Gods, they were just going in circles. He just really wanted to crawl back to bed and sleep for the next eight years. “What’s the big deal? Everything that happened last night was in the heat of the moment. That's it. Did he want me to give him back rubs afterwards or something? Aftercare?”

"Awww, our little Yuno is acting out. What, afraid of catching feelings or something?" Taeyong teased with just a tiny hint of malice.

Yuno traced the rim of his cup, the tea leaves falling in clumps at the bottom. "Don't speak to me as if I were a child," he snapped.

"Then stop acting like one," challenged the older.

There was no use arguing with Taeyong when he got like this. Placing the now empty cup on top of the table in front of him, Yuno sighed deeply, "What do you really want to hear from me, Taeyong? What do you want me to do?"

Levelling him with a gaze, the other demigod declared, "I want you to realize what you are missing out on. What you could have if you just stopped categorizing everything in black and white."

"And what exactly am I missing here?” Yuno’s patience was running thin. Maybe if everyone just stopped talking to him in circles. Maybe then. “What have you seen in the two centuries you walked this earth before me that I haven't already learned, Taeyong hyung? Go on. Tell me."

The tell-tale tick on Taeyong's jaw meant that Yuno wasn't the only one whose patience was running thin. Leaning forward, Taeyong told him with no holds barred, "Your mom- No, _our_ mother, Yuno- She isn't just the goddess of beauty."

Those were the same words Dongyoung told him before leaving in the dark of the night. Trust both Dongyoung and Taeyong to speak in riddles. Yuno rolled his eyes for the nth time, truly tired of it all. "Get to the poi-"

"Aphrodite isn’t just the goddess of beauty, little brother. She is also the goddess of _love_. She might have been forced to curse her own children but she isn't that _cruel._ Do you understand what I'm saying here? Or are you too caught up in your own little world, a world where you think everyone is out to get you, that you have forgotten about this fact too?"

Yuno squeezed his palms against his eyes, willing the annoyance to disappear. Taeyong and his shrewd logic and rose-tinted view of the way the universe worked.

The thing was, though, his half-brother might be a pain in the ass most of the time, but he wasn't a liar.

See, Yuno wasn’t that dense. He knew what he was feeling, what Dongyoung needed from him, what _he_ needed from Dongyoung. He had known for a while now, maybe since that encounter at the bakery. But accepting was a different story altogether.

Accepting meant facing the truth and letting go of everything that was instilled upon him since he was young. Accepting meant being open to change. Was that really something Yuno was ready for?

In the silence, Yuno thought about everything he had come to learn in the past few months since Dongyoung came back to his life. The butterflies, the comfort and the familiarity.

The feeling of having finally found a home in someone.

Was it worth losing his beauty for something as trivial as love? Or was he ready to lose love, to allow it to slip away from his grasp again, over something as shallow as beauty?

Was he deserving of all this, of Dongyoung?

In that moment, Yuno realized what he wanted.

Yes, he was the son of Aphrodite. But the gods overlooked one small yet crucial detail: Yuno also had human-blood running through his veins. And if there's one thing Yuno had come to learn from spending all this time staying away from them, only observing from afar, it's that humans would do absolutely anything in the name of love.

Including welcoming a curse with open arms.

The chair scraped noisily against the hardwood floor of the sitting room after standing up so suddenly. His heart was pounding like mad, threatening to leap out of his chest. Like introducing fresh air to his lungs, like suddenly getting slapped awake after centuries of slumber, like the gods finally giving him the answer to his prayers, Yuno knew what he had to do.

And so he ran as fast as his legs allowed him, leaving behind a smug Taeyong. Yuno raced out the front door, down the brick road, turning left on a corner and then bursting through the busy main street. Yuno ran to where he knew he would find Dongyoung.

His side was in stitches from running so hard that he almost missed the raven hair amongst the crowd of passersby. There he was, across the street, clutching onto a basket of what appeared to be bread, standing by the entrance of the bakery where Yuno found him - his Dongyoung - again.

As if he heard Yuno's soul calling out to him, Dongyoung looked up. And as if the argument from the night before never happened, Dongyoung smiled that beautiful all-knowing smile of his at Yuno, taking a step off the sidewalk towards Jaehyun’s side of the road, eyes never leaving his.

_One. Two._

Everyone and everything else faded into the background and maybe that's where it all went wrong.

_Three. Four steps._

Maybe if he just waited a few more hours before running to Dongyoung like a madman, maybe if he sought him out when the man was at home or in Taeyong's shop, maybe they could have avoided all this. Maybe if he just paid more attention to his surroundings.

_Five. Six. Seven. Eight._

Dongyoung was a mere arm’s grasp away from him now, just one more step and Yuno will be able to breathe again.

_Nine._

Maybe if he waited for Dongyoung to come to him, or maybe if Yuno was just fast enough so Dongyoung didn’t have to come to him in the first place.

_Ten._

Maybe then–

The earth-shattering sound of metal against human flesh was the only thing Yuno remembered in the next couple of seconds. There was ringing in his ears. He didn’t remember how he fell but when he came to, he was lying on the other side of the street. There was a single piece of cinnamon roll by his head laying on the cold, wet pavement. Where did that come from?

It looked suspiciously like the one Dongyoung was holding onto earlier. He probably bought it on the way home from Taeyong's shop, Dongyoung liked his pastries after all–

_Dongyoung._

Hands that could be gentle if he really wanted to be, brushing past his hair when the other believed he was asleep. Hands that pushed him out of the way. Hands. The same ones that lay limp a meter away from him. Dread overcame Yuno's body in waves, prompting him to crawl towards the other with what little energy left he had in him. Why was he given immortality in the first place yet still be allowed to hurt this badly?

Despite the blurriness of his vision, he still saw Dongyoung's lips move, as if he wanted to say something. Yuno tried to move him carefully, to cradle his head at least but all he heard was a gasp of pain, loud enough for Yuno to hear. Sharp enough for him to feel the pain. And that's when it all came crashing down on him.

"No, no no no _no._ "

Loss. Was this what it felt like?

There was blood and smoke everywhere, permeating Yuno's nostrils, making him heave at the stench. He was sure he was hurt somewhere from the impact of having been pushed away but that wasn't what's important at that moment.

Despite the pain he must be feeling, he heard Dongyoung call out to him, "Yuno. My Yuno."

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Yuno would not allow it to end like this. Not when he hurt Dongyoung in their last encounter so much. Not when he hadn’t made it up to him yet. It was getting harder and harder to breathe again by the second. Panicking, he blurted out the first thought that came to mind: "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you this last night. Dongyoung, I lo-"

"Don't.”

"What?" Down, down, down Yuno could feel his heart sinking. Hands shaking, grasping for whatever he could. Straws. Dongyoung. Why wouldn’t the red stop seeping through his shirt?

Dongyoung’s voice was barely above a whisper at this point but it was still firm, leaving no room for arguments, "Don't say it now, Yuno. If you say it now, I will never be able to see you again." Dongyoung’s words did not make sense but Yuno was not about to make sense of it now. Not when the grip on his arm had loosened significantly in the last 5 seconds.

He knew how painful it must have been for Dongyoung to still be speaking this much, but that was nothing compared to the crippling pain that shook his entire core when he heard Dongyoung’s next words,

"Find me. Live and find me. And tell me how you feel when you do. Tell me then."

Having felt what it was like to live with warmth and a full stomach made him yearn to never stop feeling this way again. How was he supposed to live now when the source of all of that warmth was dying in his arms?

He was almost as old as the earth but he'd only ever cried once before this. It's twice now, and over the same soul at that. The universe was cruel. Too cruel. To him. To them.

The wound, which he realized was coming from his right leg, was screaming to be tended to but the pain in his chest overshadowed everything else. Yuno had seen it all, lived through it all. But this, this was not something he was acquainted with.

Why couldn’t it have been him instead? Why did Dongyoung have to suffer through this; why did he have to suffer again? There was so much Yuno wanted to say but he couldn’t. Not like this. He felt Dongyoung's cold fingers caress his tear-stricken cheeks, his lips.

"I love you.”

This wasn't exactly how Yuno wanted to be properly confessed to for the first time in over three thousand millennia.

Doyoung then looked at him like how he did when they first met and Yuno stopped breathing altogether. He looked at him like he knew all of the universe’s secrets and was just waiting for Yuno to catch up. “I loved you then, I love you now and I will love you in another life. In every single one of them.”

Even on the brink of death, Dongyoung still had the most beautiful smile, "I love you, my Yuno."

The grip on his arm loosened completely, the body he cradled to his arms lay limp. Unmoving.

For the first time in Yuno's existence, he felt the true meaning of heartbreak.

*

The sun was rising in the horizon and Yuno was standing in front of a familiar building. It had been a while and he kind of got lost along the way, taking a few wrong turns here and there which meant that he was now running late for his appointment. That and so much had changed in the exterior that he almost did not recognize it if not for the neon green signage out front. It was already there the last time he came here albeit a lot smaller in size back then. Business must be doing good then.

Upon entering the lobby, he realized that though a lot had changed on the outside, it was pretty much the same inside. The sound of his shoes on the linoleum floor was what broke the eerie silence of the place. Yuno stopped in front of the elevator, hitting the button to go up and waited. A few seconds passed and the elevator dinged open for him.

Yuno hopped on, this time pressing the button for floor 8 and a half.

💫

"The end."

A shrill shriek pierces through the Seoul skyline, the source coming from a modest two-bedroom apartment. The galaxy-themed night light illuminates the guest room in an ethereal glow, almost like a replica of the borealis aurora. The enclosed space contains the warmth of five individuals; one of which is a little girl barely the age of 8, huddled under layers upon layers of blankets.

"Noooo! That can't be the end!" the little girl says with a small pout, dimples adorning both cheeks.

Jaehyun chuckles deep, his slightly-showing pot-belly jiggling at the movement. He rises slightly from where he's sitting on the edge of the bed to leave a fond kiss on the little girl's forehead, wishing her a good night's sleep.

Before he can move away however, he hears her whisper, "Why did it end there? Don't they get their happily ever after, Papaw?"

He takes a moment to answer, searching around the room and catches a familiar set of eyes by the doorway, looking back at him with equal love and affection. With all the confidence that only several millennia of waiting for his soulmate can garner, Jaehyun turns back to his beloved granddaughter and tells her, "Yes, they do, sweetheart. Of course they do."

"Promise?" Her bottom lip is jutted out at this point, hands escaping the prison that is the sheets she's lying down on, reaching out her right pinkie.

Jaehyun links his own around the finger, sealing, stamping and signing. "I promise."

"Will you tell me what happened to them?"

"That's a story for another day, my dear."

When he gets a sleepy smile in return, Jaehyun deems it time to leave the room so they can rest. Standing up, he makes his way towards the door but not before being stopped by a hand on his shoulder, "I can't believe you still have that memorized, Papa."

"Of course I do. You wouldn't let me or your Dad tell you anything else for years. It used to be your favorite bedtime story," Jaehyun bops the button of his daughter's nose, making her scrunch her face in turn. He bids her farewell with a peck on the temple and her husband with a friendly pat at the back.

He is almost outside the door when he hears her call out softly, "It still is my favorite."

Jaehyun looks back and observes the way his daughter tucks her own child in and then kisses her husband goodnight. He closes the door behind him, smiling to himself, and makes his way down the hallway, turning left to go where he knows someone is waiting for him.

From his point of view, he can see _him_ in the kitchen, most likely brewing tea for their usual late-night cup. The man must have left the room while Jaehyun was assuring their grandchild that the people in the story do, in fact, get their happy ending.

Jaehyun walks closer, the expensive carpet muffling the sound of his footsteps and upon reaching him, Jaehyun wraps both arms around his tiny waist. Breathing in the homey scent of his husband before sighing out in contentment.

"I love you," Jaehyun tells him, unprecedented. Jaehyun tells him this every chance he gets, not because he's afraid of having him slip between his fingers again, or because Jaehyun has waited several lifetimes before he could admit it to himself, much less the person in front of him. He tells him this not because he feels like he has to for fear of living an eternity alone.

Jaehyun tells him he loves him because it's his truth.

The man wriggles out of his grasp to face Jaehyun, not wasting a minute to cup both his cheeks, a knowing smile gracing his features. Jaehyun is sure that with only a few inches of distance between them, his husband can see the deep wrinkles that don't just appear when Jaehyun smiles anymore. His hair, the color once ever changing depending on his mood, is now a permanent shade of salt and pepper. Mostly salt. There are freckles and moles littering his whole face, small warts here and there. His lips that used to be full and rosy-pink are now in a constant state of dry and cracked due to the cold.

And although the man in front of him isn't any better, Jaehyun can still say with utmost honesty that he married and fell in love with the true fairest of them all.

Jaehyun knows this isn't their final evolution yet, but he can't wait to grow grayer in the years ahead, so long as he has the man in front of him to weather through it. If falling in love meant gaining a few pounds, losing his beauty and abandoning everything that used to make him lonely, if it meant spending the rest of his life with his soulmate, then Jaehyun would gladly choose to fall. In their next life. In every single one of them.

Several minutes of comfortable silence pass and he still hasn't received a response so Jaehyun repeats himself, "I love you."

And once more for good measure,

"I love you, my Doyoung."

💫

The song on the radio faded out and the voice of the host broke through to address the audience, _"It's 5 minutes to midnight. Hold on tight to your partners and get ready to pucker those lips for in a few moments, we shall welcome the new century together…"_

Yuno searched around the room, patience wearing thin at this point. He still disliked mass gatherings and still didn't understand the point of having them but he knew he had to let it slide this once.

If the fates were true to their word, then he was going to meet _him_ again tonight. Yuno hadn't stopped searching, hadn't stopped waiting, not for a single moment since he witnessed him die in his arms. He glanced down at his silver watch, leg bouncing up and down in anticipation. Patience never really was his strongest suit but it already took Yuno several lifetimes to meet him again and another 25 years to get here so what's a couple more seconds, really?

From his peripheral vision, he could see a figure making its way towards the area where he's seated, treading the crowd of drunk twenty-somethings like a seasoned pro. Sharp eyes and raven hair. Exactly like how he looked the last time Yuno saw him. Except this time, the air didn't smell like copper, crushed metal and death. Rather, it smelled of new beginnings. Of hope.

And then the screaming began.

_"Ten!"_

"Excuse me, is this seat taken?"

_"Nine!"_

"No."

_"Eight!"_

"May I, then?"

_"Seven!"_

"Be my guest."

_"Six!"_

"So, uhm, what's your name?"

_"Five!"_

"Yuno. Jeong Yuno."

_"Four!"_

"Nice to meet you. I'm Kim Dongyoung."

_"Three!"_

"I know."

_"Two!"_

"Good. Hey, Yuno-ssi. Do you believe in soulmates?"

_"One!"_

"Yes."

They leaned in at the same time. Yuno closed his eyes at the last second, just before their lips met, savoring the taste of Dongyoung. He still tasted like apples and vanilla and Yuno couldn't get enough of it.

With tentative hands wrapped around his neck, pulling him even closer, Yuno’s own automatically finding their way to Dongyoung’s waist, he had never felt more at peace.

Yuno was finally home.

They might be but mere specks in the grand scheme of things but in this moment - surrounded by strangers and wandering souls alike, fireworks painting the sky outside with gold, red, silver and green specks of light - everything they knew was stardust.

Aphrodite smiled upon the scene from her seat in the clouds.

💫

**Author's Note:**

> if you made it until the end, ilu.
> 
> 7k words of this were written in the span of two weeks and the other 7k was written the day before the start of postings. yupyup! master procrastinator, das me. special thanks to the mods for being patient and for still accepting my work despite me submitting it 3 hours past the deadliest deadline. i'll be better next time, i swear!! pls don't blacklist me ;-;
> 
> i would love to hear your thoughts. comments and kudos are v much appreciated ㅎㅎ
> 
> thank you so much <3
> 
> [cc](https://curiouscat.me/donsjae)   
>  [twt](https://mobile.twitter.com/donsjae)


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